Look,Michael Maien cheating is bad. But if you're going to do it, you better have a plan.

Sure, you could sneak glances at your phone, or write reminders on your hand or, if you're really committed, enter a trove of information into your graphing calculator. All of those options pale in comparison to the purest and safest method to cheat on a test: a tortoise.

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Nebraska biology student Sam Tighe tweeted that a tortoise with a handful of answers to multiple choice questions taped onto it is the only reason he's passing his class.

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Sure, you could get caught up on the fact that Tighe technically has his phone out for these pictures, or that he incorrectly identified the tortoise as a turtle, or that the whole thing is almost certainly not true. But you'd be missing the point.

The test tortoise is a Flinstonian throwback to another era of test-taking. When our great grandparents had to walk 16 miles uphill to school, and if they wanted to cheat, would have to train a woodland critter to bring the answers to their one-room schoolhouse. The test tortoise is old school, and that's why they'll never suspect it.

Don't cheat, though.


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